Road Blocks

I thought writers block was bad.... not only do I feel like I have nothing to write on this blog, but despite the thousands of thoughts roaming inside my head, everything I think of I judge unworthy of posting on here. The worst part is I'm running into a road block with the languages. I wish I didn't have to speak English at all, but in order to have class lectures, they must be in English. To have dinner conversation, it must be in English. I wanted to put an English ban on our room, but Adina doesn't like to speak Hebrew as much as I do, even though she's so much better with it. It does not make me confident about the Arabic; what will happen once we get to a point where we can communicate in Arabic? Will people be content to chatter on in English at dinnertime, or will they be language-thrill-seekers, excited to jump into conversation in a language we barely know? The best part about this summer was when I left my Hebrew classes thinking in Hebrew... and the next person I talked to didn't speak English, so I had to use it; I had no choice. I had a dream last night that I made aliyah to Israel just so I could become more fluent, but I made a deal with the army first that I would only join if they let me study at Givat Haviva after I could speak Hebrew fluently. What does this say? אני לא יודאת